just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize