No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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