if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube