I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride