Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
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