Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
