Me. At least after what I've been through.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
