We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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