how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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