You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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