Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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