I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize