the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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