And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
