Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
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