she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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