You're so nebulous sometimes
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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