what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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