Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I enjoy the company of your penis
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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