no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
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Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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