I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
