How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize
