there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
someone owes me an orgasm
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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