I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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