My nipple is on Facebook.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
that may or may not have been my penis.
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