What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
