I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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