google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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