So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
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it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
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I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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