i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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