so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize