I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
And then the night went full on bisexual.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize