Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Randomize
