I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
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