i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
