Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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