Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
