He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
