Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
