When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
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i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
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Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
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