check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.