That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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