we were pretty classy up until the second keg
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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