im drinking this country out of the recession.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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