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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it

  Fav 5 3244 1400

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.

  Fav 21 1418 5182

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice

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• (912): View more from Georgia

  Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.

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• (626): View more from California

  i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over

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• (530): View more from California

  She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy

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• (585): View more from New York

  I just need some of your time and all of your body.

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