OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
