yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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