Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
there was a trapeze. enough said
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
