she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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