She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
