I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize
