i just google imaged poop.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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