I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
