WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
